Recipe – Smoked salmon tagliatelle

We’ve all been there, bounding home from work to see our Significant Other, excited to share a meal, discuss the day’s events, analyse the growth of the chilli plants on the balcony and generally do the things that people who share their lives together do. But then your phone goes and your SO says, ‘Sorry hun, not in for dinner tonight. James from the agency is taking me for a mega wank free nosh up at Gaucho’. So that’s when we make smoked salmon tagliatelle.

So then it’s just you, Patti Stanger, your empty belly and a mind bereft of what to make for dinner because you’re so used to cooking for two. It’s so pointless making a meal for one, I’ll just have a bottle of Rioja and some Doritos with my 24 hours in A&E while tears roll down my cheeks unchecked, weeping at the raw beauty and struggle of humanity. And while that is fine, (I don’t judge, we’ve all been there) the majority of the time you really should eat something. And no, not Domino’s. So, I’ve created Solo me for you, Dear Reader and also for me, the solo weekday diners, while our partners are off nomming Argentine eye fillet washed down with £80 bottles of Patagonian Malbec.

Smoked salmon tagliatelle with lemon and capers

All the wonders that will create your dinner.

Ingredients

• Roughly 100g of smoked salmon (more if you’ve got it, no such thing as too much smoked salmon IMHO)
• A tablespoon of capers
• Light crème fraiche or light pouring (single) cream
• 3 small nests of tagliatelle
• Rind of one lemon, finely grated
• 1 clove of garlic, crushed
• Black pepper to serve
• A teaspoon of lighter butter
• A splash of white wine (optional) or pasta water

Creme fraiche, capers, butter, lemon rind = #boom

Set your nests of tagliatelle to boil in salted water while starting on your sauce. Put your frying pan on a medium heat and add the crushed garlic and butter, stir occasionally until vampires could no longer tolerate your presence. Add the capers and the lemon zest, stir some more. Chop your smoked salmon into bite-size strips. Add two tablespoons (healthy ones) of crème fraiche to the pan, stir to combine. NOW, at this point, if you’re drinking white wine, add a splash to this sauce. I never have white wine in Casa Del G&J and these meals are about using what you have around you. If, like me, you don’t have white wine, add a splash of the pasta water to loosen the sauce. Add the smoked salmon slices and stir lightly. Drain your pasta and add to the sauce, mix well.

Glory is upon you.

Throw the lot into a bowl, garnish with a healthy amount of cracked black pepper, grab a fork, settle on the couch and switch on ITVBe, Millionaire Matchmaker is on. Enjoy your smoked salmon tagliatelle.

Solo me, saving solo diners from Domino’s one meal at a time.

Dig in, Millionaire Matchmaker is on!